Happy Resurrection Day! I don’t know about you, but I regularly need a little personal resurrection from my bad attitudes. My bad habits. The whole works, especially my heart. One symptom is subtle, blaming God.
If I pause long enough to think, blaming God cracks me up. Especially when little kids do it. God wants me to eat a whole basket of Easter candy today.
Ever feel like blaming God? Of course. Sometimes, we all feel forgotten by God. We all may feel like it’s His fault somehow whenever things get tough.
God Coulda Stopped This
Such a convenient way to release ourselves from culpability! God made me do it. It must be His fault I ate so many potato chips because potatoes taste so good. Or I feel so overwhelmed.
Or, another favorite line: God coulda stopped this from happening.
But behind the blame is a false assumption, according to Paula Patton Quinn, author of Questions God Asks Us. And she nailed it down for me in our recent interview.
“God is withholding from me,” is the thought behind our feelings of abandonment, according to Paula. (Find how one man responded in a life-threatening situation.)
Blaming God?
Since Paula has vast experience in America’s judicial system, she’s seen more than her share of injustice. (Find more about responding to injustice.)
Naturally, Paula has a deep appreciation of mercy and compassion. (Find more from Paula here.)
“That whole idea of forgotten by God or blaming God, either one, starts with Adam and Eve,” says Paula. She explains how Adam blamed God for his sin. “‘Well, it’s that woman you gave me. It’s not my fault. You’re the one who came up with that idea.’ You know, before, they were in paradise,” she laughs.
Blaming God is Contagious
Eve follows her husband’s lead and tries to sidestep her responsibility, too.
“‘Well, it’s the serpent.’ Again, the implication is, ‘You’re in charge here, God. You let this happen,’” explains Paula. “Really, that lie God is holding out is part of the original contagion to Eve to the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil.”
Of course, the serpent couldn’t wait to imply God was holding out. The fruit is beautiful. It looks tasty.
The Root of Control
Why does blaming God, at it’s root, lead to control issues? Paula explains.
“The implication is Why doesn’t God want me to have this; it’s so good? And so then you start thinking, Well, I can do it. God’s holding out,” she says. Next thing you know, we scheme to implement “God’s will” in our life.
“But I feel like it’s up to me to go get it. It’s up to me to make it happen. If something needs to happen, I’m not sure God will come through for me,” Paula continues. “Frequently, the go-to is I will make it happen. And I start up with my own agenda.” Surely all strong women can relate!
In addition, she cites Abraham and Sarah as another great example of making things happen in an impatient attempt to accomplish “God’s will.”
When God Needs Some Help
“Sarah feels like God needs some help. He’s holding out on us. He said He was gonna do this, but look, I’m not getting any younger. And I’m not getting any babies,” reports Paula. Sarah has a solution.
“So, she (Sarah) comes up with the great idea of Hagar. We talked about that in the first time (podcast),” says Paula. Like so many of our great ideas to help God, Sarah’s self-willed idea backfires.
“Then she gets the child and it’s kind of this bad family situation,” points out Paula with a chuckle. “Nobody gets along with anybody because of it.” But God is not done with Sarah or Hagar or Abraham.
Not Forgotten
“Now if anyone feels forgotten, it’s Sarah. There was a promise made. God has not come through. She took matters into her own hands. That’s been kind of a disaster. But she’s basically taken that as her lot in life.”
Ultimately, scene comes to a culmination in another one of God’s questions. Is anything too hard for God?
Fortunately, God is always about the business of redemption. Whether it’s rebooting my pitiful attitude, answering prayer, or demonstrating His tender love in a zillion ways daily!
Opening Up Communication With God
When we treat God like He can’t be trusted, we risk shutting down our communication with Him, according to Paula.
“He’s not coming through for you. He’s not coming through for me. We are on our own,” may be the thoughts in our head when we feel God has let us down, says Paula. “And that pretty much closes the door for God. It shuts down the communication (with God).” Additionally, blaming God shuts down our sense of access to Him. Hope and faith shut down.
Fortunately, that’s not the end of the story. A woman around a hundred years old promised a baby? Even in Sarah’s case, nothing is too hard for God. (Find compassion when withstanding the pain of infertility and miscarriage.) Only a year later Sarah finally gives birth to the long-awaited child.
Paula puts it another way.
“What I found when I was looking at that question is there’s another translation, even more basic,” Paula reports, “Is anything too wonderful for God?”
Is anything too wonderful for God?
In writing my books, I soon found myself praying a prayer for my own family and for YOU. Bless us now good Father because that is Your heart’s desire.
Blaming God and taking control is the opposite of where we want to be. Instead, our weakness is the place we want to be with God. Sounds crazy, I know. (If you missed Gina Butler’s book, What About Her? find it here. You’ll love Gina’s Texas twang insight on great women of the Bible, just like you and me.)
But if it’s too hard for me, that’s a good thing because what is too hard for God? Our weakness is the place where He does shows up and shows Himself to be wonderful.
Meditation vs. Contemplation
You can easily imagine for an active gal like me, sitting still is crucial for my mental health. In the stillness I ponder the wonder of God. But both in her book and in our interview, Paula really challenged me to rethink the way I meditate.
If the difference between meditation and contemplation fascinates you too, you’ll love our interview and the way Paula spells it out in her book. Her ideas are too deep for me to adequately convey here. I need time to contemplate them. Or maybe meditate on them. Uh, I’m not sure which. Wink, wink.
Speaking of meditating on God’s goodness, last year our DIY Stations of the Cross were such a big hit with our neighbors, we decided to make an Easter tradition out of it. Well, confession time. Honestly, traditions at our house are anything we get organized enough to do two years in a row.
Triumphant in the Face of the Cross
This is the week Christians around the globe consider Jesus’s ride into Jerusalem on the back of a donkey. Oh, how the crowds loved Him! For a shiny split second.
Still, some kept loving Him through the heartache and trials of the days ahead. Here’s my secret for hanging in there when things get tough!
Whatever trials you’ve experienced since last Easter, I pray you keep your head up and your eyes focused on the beautiful cross. Jesus’s resurrection follows His sacrifice. The sacrifice He made because he loves you and me. YOU are dear to my heart. And to the heart of Jesus, the Living One.
🙂
cathy
We LOVE to hear from YOU!
What is your best tip for helping kiddos take responsibility for their decisions? When has someone blaming God affected your life?What Easter traditions are your family’s favorites?
May we pray together?
Dear good Father, We think about Your Son’s death and resurrection and we know You love each one of us. Thank You for our families. We praise You for blessing us in ways we can’t even comprehend. Your mercy and forgiveness and compassion extend to generations. Help us walk upright. Teach us to trust You ad live in devotion to Your beautiful Holy Spirit. Help us live lives that inspires our children and grandchildren. Uphold them as they lead generations to come to You. Bless us now because that’s Your heart’s desire. In Jesus’s name. Amen
More On Fireside Talk Radio
Next up, I chat with Erin Kerry, Being her guest was a big treat! She asked all the right questions about Conversational adventures. Erin pointed out the right conversations at home relieve stress and spark wholeness in families. (Find more of Erin’s wisdom about Sparking Wholeness and The Brain-Gut Connection. Find my books at Valerosa Designs and Gallery.)
Next, Nancy Kay Grace joins me to talk about how our families can foster grace and joy no matter the circumstance. She speaks from experience. You will LOVE this dear friend’s heart.
For Mother’s Day, I chose a great gift for moms everywhere. Re/Engage Director Susan Cox joins me to talk about transforming marriages. You are going to LOVE her and every word she shares!
More People We LOVE!
Speaking of great books, don’t miss What About Her? written by my friend, Gina Butler. She’ll be joining me soon on FTR and you will get such a belly-laugh out of her hilarious personality. All that and tons of insight about healthy Biblical ways to live.
By the Way, signed copies of both my books are now available at Valerosa Designs and Galleries, one of our favorite places to hang out. (More about one amazing woman’s impact on local culture.)
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Cathy Krafve, Speaker, Blogger, Podcaster, and author of The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations and Marriage Conversation: From Coexisting to Cherished. We invite you to join the Fireside Tribe. Truth with a Texas Twang.
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