I know better than to ask an expert on anxiety and depression to be a guest on our show.
Naturally, just days before my interview with Michelle Lazurek, my computer crashed. I mean dead. So, there I lay. In bed in the middle of the night. Wide awake. Totally stressed, anxious, panicky, pushing back depression and helplessness.
What did I do? I laughed.
Then, I started to pray. Praying always puts me right to sleep. Long before I make it through all eight grandkids.
Anxiety? Panic over nonessentials? Yep, this is not my first rodeo.
The next morning I checked my stock of yellow legal pads, just in case. But of course, my computer issues melted away.
How Panic and Anxiety Feel
“(Panic is) that constant feeling of fear. That comes in waves,” describes Michelle, “If you can’t get it under control, they (the waves of anxiety) happen more rapidly in succession. To the point where I was feeling like that all day long. And so I couldn’t stop it.”
A pastor’s wife is the last person on earth you’d expect to experience anxiety, panic, and depression. Aren’t pastor’s wives in their own class of spiritual perfection?
“It’s hard for me because I’m a pastor’s wife. My struggles are out there for everyone to see,” Michele shares. “Not only was I struggling with my mental health but they had to tell the church. The leaders had to know.”
In fact, their whole congregation had to know, too, because Michelle needed to take a retreat, an extended leave of absence.
“When you’re not in church for 3 or 4 weeks, people start to ask questions. So we had to tell the church what was going on.”
I Surrender All (Sort of)
Twenty years ago at a rehearsal, the worship team at Michelle’s church all chuckled when their guitar player toyed with a favorite old hymn, I Surrender All. But he changed the words. I Surrender Some.
“We say we surrender all, but we really mean I surrender some,” she laughs.
“I surrender all. But not my marriage. Or my finances. My kids. Or those other areas of our lives that we really don’t want God to really have control over,” she says.
Seriously, we all say we want God to be in charge, but we really hold back a bit. Or maybe a lot.
“Because what if He gives us an outcome that we don’t like. So we sing the hymn but we don’t always mean everything. It’s just the stuff we want to give up,” she adds.
Surrender With Benefits
Michelle felt God nudging her to write about surrender a few years ago. But she wasn’t convinced she knew enough about the topic to do it justice.
She’s an accomplished author with a dozen books to her credit. A self-diagnosed perfectionist, she was used to having her life under control. Her control.
“So oftentimes, especially my nonfiction books are experiences I have lived through. So they’re things I have come from the other side of with hopefully some practical applications and lessons for people to take with them,” she explains.
Michelle was about to get another lesson directly from her good Father in heaven.
“I learned first hand how to surrender all of my life to the Lord. I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder.” She writes about what she learned in her new book, I Surrender All (Sort of): Laying Down Your Plans So God Can Do the Impossible.
In our podcast, she also talked about ways to settle your anxious heart, including mindfulness.
Please check out our conversations with Erin Kerry and Colleen Long on Fireside Talk Radio for more on mental and emotional well-being.
Even in the midst of Michelle’s crisis, there was a silver lining.
“But more importantly, it’s been my experience to know and experience God in a whole new way,” she explains about how the writing process unfolded for her as she learned to trust Him and surrender.
Her Church Shined
Along with seeking help, Michelle says finding community is crucial to reclaiming mental health.
“When you are having mental health (challenges), the person experiencing it doesn’t know that the thinking they have is distorted,” explains Michelle. “So we need people in our life to help us figure out, you know, what’s true. What’s fiction? Why am I getting so anxious about this particular thing? We need the help of the community around us.”
With gratitude and love, Michelle says her church really stepped up in her crisis to help her get through it. You can find a list of ways her church reached out to comfort her in this week’s episode above. Watch for next week’s podcast for even more.
Also, she emphasizes that the church as a whole must build authentic community where we can talk about the things that really matter. The things that are on our hearts. All the real struggles we all face.
“That’s what the world is looking for. That’s when the church shines,” explains Michelle. “When we can say, we’re broken, too. And we accept you into our fellowship.”
In this age, the church needs to build community around people, especially those with mental illness, according to Michelle.
Champions for Others
Here’s just another reason I am so proud to bring you more of Michelle’s wisdom next week: Definitely, Satan wants us awake at night worrying instead of praying.
But Michelle’s a champion. A strong warrior woman. She took her personal experience with anxiety, depression, and panic. Then, transformed it into a sacred story; something God can use to help others.
Don’t you love it when people tell the truth about how hard life can be? Then, I really love it when they share what might work for the rest of us.
Seeking Help
“Anxiety and mental health and depression are on the rise because of COVID. So many people are struggling,” reports Michelle. “This is very difficult time that we’re living in. We need to help each other more than ever. If you’re a believer, reach out to your local church and ask for help. That’s what they’re there for. They are there to help you.”
Since mental and emotional health are such a widespread issue, more and more people are trained to help.
Of course, the best place to talk about anything stressful is at church. Why? Because that’s where folks come together to encourage each other.
“So if you’re out there and you’re struggling, find a community. Find some help. Reach out. Don’t be embarrassed or ashamed,” adds Michelle.
If you walk into a church where everyone seems perfect, leave quickly before you mess it up. You are welcome to visit my church, Galilee Baptist; we have lots of imperfect people.
Freedom From Anxiety
“If you’re out there and you’re struggling with anxiety or depression or other mental illness, you can find freedom’” Michelle says. “There’s not one thing that God’s love cannot touch. There’s nothing in our lives that God’s love and presence and His miraculous works can’t help us overcome.”
Next week, Michelle goes into more depth about how to maintain our sense of well-being, even when we feel overwhelmed. You don’t want to miss her personal wisdom on this critical subject. Find more from Michelle here.
Don’t forget, these episodes of Fireside Talk Radio are designed to take to your Sunday school classes to start great conversations in your own church. Plus, our podcasts can start healthy conversations in your family.
As always, when I count my blessings, I always think of you. Additionally, you are such a BIG blessing that I usually forget to be anxious as I thank God for you, my beloved friends.
We are partners in getting positive messages out into our hurting culture. Thank you for all you do to encourage us. We hope today’s blog and interview with Michelle encourages you, too.
🙂
cathy
Before we pray–
I want to thank God for some recent blessings that mean the world to me.
First, if you love common sense Texas style you’re gonna love my friends’ Bible Study. Gina Butler and Callie Lee bring mother daughter hilarity to serious Bible wisdom. Confident Faith in an Anxious World.
Next, Deep in the Heart Women’s conference was a huge success. Thank you for praying and to all who showed up! I’m sure you’ll see lots of pictures on social media in the coming days. Jesus met us there (as we knew He would). I am praising Him for every bit of it!
Then, too, I keep thanking God for my friends at Oilfield Christian Fellowship. Who (but God) would ever think I would be the gal speaking to a room packed with guys. This cracks me up everytime I think of it and reminds me God has a sense of humor.
So a big shout out (and praise God) to my friends at DIH, Grace English and Tammy Whitehurst and the whole crew for thinking to include me. And to Terry Bates and John Trosclair of OCF for trusting God when I open my mouth.
May we pray together?
Dear good Father, we all lie awake at night and worry sometimes. You call us to trust You, but You give us a choice. We praise You for designing our bodies; our physical, emotional, and spiritual functioning. Oftentimes, we have no idea why we react the way we do. Yet, we can choose to trust You. So simple and, yet, so challenging for mere mortals like us! Free us from our perfectionistic drives. Teach us to walk humbly with You, our beloved and mighty Creator. Bless us now because that is Your heart’s desire. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
We LOVE to hear from YOU!
How is God teaching you something new lately? When has a church member reached out in a way that truly blessed you? Which conversations do you wish you could have in your family?
More Favorite Quotes:
“Just when the caterpillar thought the world was ending, he turned into a butterfly.” ~Anonymous proverb
“Anxiety is the hand maiden of creativity.” ~T. S. Eliot
“It is well with my soul.”~Horatio G. Spafford
Cathy Krafve, host of Fireside Talk Radio and author of The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations and Marriage Conversation: From Coexisting to Cherished. We welcome your stories, ideas, and questions at CathyKrafve.com.
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