I’m so happy to share Becky Carpenter’s wisdom this week about her daughter who “ran into heaven.” Since I interviewed Becky her phrase, running into heaven, has been reverberating in my imagination.
Today, she shares more about running into heaven. Plus, 3 Tips for Coping with Grief and Suffering.
Becky Carpenter’s family went through a major tragedy when they lost her beautiful 15-year-old daughter, Skyler. However, Skylar is not really lost; Becky knows exactly where Skylar is.
As assistant principal, Becky headed to the scene of a school bus accident. When she got there it was chaos. While her daughter, Skylar, did not survived the accident on this earth; she survives in heaven. Find more of Skylar’s story.
What would it look like at my funeral if my kids knew I ran into heaven? What if we couldn’t wait to be face to face with Jesus?
How would it look today if we put on our running shoes and start running in that direction now, with all our might? Actually, I know a few folks who live that way now. I bet you do, too.
Running into Heaven
When Becky says Skylar ran into heaven, she means it two ways. First, it’s personal because Skylar had a special kind of energy and unconditional love about her.
But it’s also spiritual and can apply to us all.
Becky really loves telling about how “Skyler just lived her life full throttle.”
“But the day I went into labor with her, my labor was only 45 minutes,” laughs Becky. “She literally ran into this world almost in the parking lot as I was walking into the hospital.”
Becky loves what God continues to teach her, using her beautiful daughter and the darkest experience of her life. It’s been a journey, that’s for sure.
“We have a very present God; He is not a past tense God,” Becky reports, for instance.
So, when she comforts other people who experience excruciating grief, she likes to begin with a clear truth.
Comfort In Our Future
“Because of Jesus Christ, if your loved one who has run ahead of us had a relationship with Jesus and you have a relationship with Jesus, they are not in our past, they are in our future,” she explains.
Realizing her daughter got to heaven first created a dramatic shift in the way Becky now thinks about heaven.
“That’s where I see Skylar. When I say she ran into heaven, I know how excited she always was about everything she was involved in.”
Skylar had a quiet faith, according to her mom, but a very strong faith. She knew the Lord. She accepted Jesus Christ at the age of ten. These are all very comforting thoughts for Skylar’s family. But Becky soon discovered God had more.
Running into Heaven Means One Day Closer
“And this is where the shift happened. He basically asked me, Am I living like I believe His word?”
Basically, Christians may know what is true, but do we live like we believe? Are we excited about going home to heaven? Like our citizenship is not on earth anyway? Like we can’t wait to see God’s face?
For example, Becky laughs about always shying away from reading the Book of Revelations “because, you know, Revelation’s one of them scary books.” But knowing her daughter got to heaven first changed her perspective.
“I found myself wanting to learn everything I could about heaven,” she reports.
God birthed a ministry out of our tragedy. The Carpenters named it One Day Closer.
“Because that started out as my mama heart prayer,” Becky explains. “Every morning I would wake up and when my feet would hit the floor, I would just say, ‘Thank You, Lord, for bringing me one day closer.’”
3 Tips to Cope with Grief and Suffering
#1 Power in Praise
“When you are praising the Father, your thoughts are not on yourself. And so, I want to suggest this to anyone going through suffering, turn on Christian music. Because Christian music is birthed out of lyrics that come straight from God’s word. These Christian artists put His word to music.
Becky knows from hard experience grief makes it hard to focus.
“Because sometimes, our hearts are so weary it’s hard for us to pick up God’s word. So, I play Christian music.”
Certainly, she warns Satan wants to paralyze us whenever grief and suffering overwhelm us.
“We can’t just be in a fetal position in the bed. Because that’s the easy way out,” says Becky, adding to fight back against the enemy’s schemes. “So we have to intentionally implement some things that are gonna work. Praise and worship music is one.”
#2 Get in God’s Word
“There are times when we are physically and emotionally tired. But those are the times when we probably need it the most,” says Becky.
She adds God can even use His word through a text message from a friend. Or she suggests turning on an audio Bible.
“God’s truth rebukes Satan’s lies,” she says. Even though Satan gets “all up in our emotions” Becky explains that God, too, gets in there to give us peace and comfort. Especially through His word and through His truth.
“God’s word is really the number one thing. But when you’re in the heat of the fire, it’s hard to pick up your Bible and read,” she adds.
#3 Ask for Help
“Surround yourself with people who will also jump in the fire with you,” says Becky. “Because you gotta have a support system and they need to be other followers of Jesus Christ.”
Of course it takes a special friend to do the hard work of tough love when we hurt.
“They need to be the ones that will hold you accountable and say, ‘Look, Becky, you gotta get up. You gotta brush your teeth today. You’ve gone six days without washing your hair,’” she says form experience.
She emphasizes one more truth. Prayer is the number one way to cry out for help. Because the number one Person to ask for help is Jesus.
“My most powerful prayer, ‘Help me.’ The Lord always did. He always lightened the heaviness,” she reports.
Unexpected Comfort: Skylar Stories
Of course, Skylar may have seemed like a typical teenager. Certainly, she didn’t walk through the school halls with a bible in her hand.
“But the thing she did that impacted other people is she just loved people unconditionally. She loved on all people,” says her mom.
Becky tells the story of one young man who came up to her at the candlelight vigil the students organized.
The young man had a very hard home life. Many times he went home and there was no electricity. So he came to school with an odor because he wasn’t able to bathe. Of course, as assistant principal, she knew more of the story than most people. He was very introverted and quiet.
“With big tears in his eyes, he looked to me and he said, ‘Mrs C (cus the kids call me Mrs. C), why Skylar? She was the only kid ever nice to me.’”
A Legacy of Love
And so, in this example and countless others, Skylar left a legacy of love.
“She loved everyone who crossed her path,” says Becky. “She would just laugh and love and be a kid.”
Becky recognized the joy of the Lord flowing out of her daughter.
“His light was shining through her even though she was fifteen and she didn’t even know what was causing all of that,” says her mom, adding, “She was just leaving an impact that was planted in the hearts of all these people who crossed her path.”
Becky says young people can leave an impact even though they don’t even realize it by the way they interact in all their relationships. As adults, all of us can learn to love unconditionally, just like Skylar did so naturally.
“Be strong and courageous for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”
~Joshua 1:9, Skylar’s favorite verse.
“And to be bold in our love for others. I think that’s a message. It certainly was a message for me that I needed to know after she left our home and went to her real home,” says Becky.
Living Proof
Becky’s life is proof, that in the darkest moment, when you think you can’t possibly live through it, still God is there.
Would you like to know more about Jesus and how a personal relationship with Him might work for you? Find info When a Good Man Dies. The story of our dear friend, David Stiles. I’m sure David ran into heaven. He’s probably already found Skylar, since they both loved people so much.
Without a doubt, I am always thankful for listening and reading friends who join together to in reach a culture that needs good news. That means YOU!
I am also amazed at my friend Becky, especially for her courage. Every bit of her story is dear to me because it’s made her the woman she is today. God’s Spirit is so strong in Becky. Please help others by sharing Becky’s story with anyone who needs encouraging.
If you have a teenage daughter, check out what One Day Closer’s Ignite Conference.
If your life has been hit out of the blue by a tragedy. Was your life rocking along in what we call “normal” when suddenly everything changed? Or maybe you have a friend deep in grief and suffering. Find more comfort from Becky.
And know please know that YOU are loved.
🙂
cathy
We LOVE to hear from YOU!
What would it look like at your funeral if your kids knew you ran into heaven? How do you think it will be when you see Jesus face to face? How would it look today if we put on our running shoes and start running in that direction now, with all our might? If you were to die tonight, are you sure you will wake up in heaven? (Find out more about how you can join Jesus in heaven.)
May we pray together?
Dear good Father, we forget that we are not home yet. We long for more here on earth and don’t even realize our longing is really just to be with You. Fill us with Your beautiful Spirit and let us point others toward You. Help us run towards You now. Bless us now because that is Your heart[s desire. In Jesus’ name. Amen.
More Favorite Quotes
“Isolation is where the devil takes you to go in for the kill.” ~Sandy Bristow
“It’s sad we have such self-protection. We don’t want to let people in. We hear it all the time, but people don’t want to let others in. They want to protect. They want to hide….And they’re hurting.” ~Scott Kedersha.
“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.” ~Helen Keller
“The dogmas of the quiet past are inadequate to the stormy present. The occasion is piled high with difficulty, and we must rise with the occasion. As our case is new, so we must think anew and act anew.” ~Abraham Lincoln
Stay Tuned for More Adventures!
Watch for Becky in the soon-to-be release, The Write Calling: Encouragement for the Writer’s Heart with Deb Dearmond. . As you know, my dear friend Gina Butler and I feel God’s leading to help other writers get their book written, thus, Writing Friends.
Like us, the Living Write Texas authors want you to write your book. In this compilation book, The Write Calling, nine authors share their “insights, wins, and misses.” Don’t give up on your book! Instead, check out this great resource coming out any minute!
Then, Father’s Day is around the corner and we are praising God for the good men we know! We’re always amazed when men tell us they are listening in.
So, in honor of men everywhere, I’m taking on a nail-biting topic that several people have asked me quietly to address. Erectile dysfunction is not a topic easy to bring up at church, that’s for sure!
But I had to wait until I had an authority with no pills or procedures to sell. Fortunately, we’ll hear from Dr. Jim McAndrews. Two shows answering our questions about erectile dysfunction and then, his testimony. What an amazing friend and expert!
Plus, look for Tammy Whitehurst, Callie Lee & Gina Butler soon! And finally, with summer around the corner, Anna will be co-hosting again. I can hardly wait!
I am so THANKFUL for YOU!
Cathy Krafve, host of Fireside Talk Radio and author of The Well: The Art of Drawing Out Authentic Conversations and Marriage Conversation: From Coexisting to Cherished. We welcome your stories, ideas, and questions at CathyKrafve.com.
Recent Comments